Cure for Chaos

If watching the news about cruising is making your head spin, know that you’re not alone. Who knows when and how it will all shake out, but in the meanwhile, we can nurture our passion in any number of ways. Here are a few:

Don’s Family Vacations – If you want to know what’s happening on a daily basis, you can get it from Don. His lively reports will have you grimacing and laughing, as you experience the full craziness going on right now.   

How to find it: Don posts regularly on YouTube. Just search for “Don’s Family Vacations.”

Nova, Season 44, Episode 4, “Ultimate Cruise Ship” – This is a fascinating look at what it took to create Regent’s Seven Seas Explorer, from its bronze propellers lovingly calibrated to avoid vibration to its funnel of aluminum, designed to counterweight the ship’s decadent marble suites. We may not all be able to shell out more than $650 a night, but we can vicariously enjoy—at least for 53 minutes.

How to find it: You will need to purchase PBS Passport. It’s inexpensive and provides a vast array of programming.

 “Love Boat” reruns – This will date me, but Gavin MacLeod’s recent passing reminded me of the first time cruising hit my radar. For a time, on Saturday nights, I had a date with the “Love Boat.” It made cruising intriguing, if you could get past the PA announcements.

Fast forward to 2021, with 26 cruises behind me, I can enjoy comparing Hollywood’s version to the real thing. I imagine you will too.

Regal Princess' shrine to the TV show

How to find it: You can stream it from Paramount, but you need to be a subscriber. If you’re an Amazon Prime member, it will cost an extra $5.99 a month after the free trial.

 Don’t want to spend anything? There are plenty of Love Boat clips and trivia on YouTube. You can even find a Princess ship or two playing the show’s theme song with its horn, as it pulls out of the harbor with some very excited cruisers.

 

Cruise Directors: A Job as Big as the Ship They Sail In

Some play it straight. Some steal the show. Some are even in the show.

They’re all front and center. It’s tough to ignore your cruise director.

Ever since Julie’s voice penetrated the PA on the “Love Boat,” the cruise director has become a pivotal presence on ships. Part customer service rep, part salesman, part cheerleader, part actor—and even sometimes, part comedian—the cruise director is, undoubtedly, the most visible crew member onboard.

The cruise director tells us what’s going on every day, and what we should spend more money on. “He”—because in 20 cruises+, we’ve only had one “she”—hobnobs with cruise loyalists, and is quick with a handshake and small talk.

He emcees events—indeed, can make or break them. There’s been more than one “Love and Marriage” game show where the CD came to the rescue with a nudge, a tease, an innuendo—anything to liven up the contestants.

Kicking off the aqua show on Allure of the Seas

Yet this is only the part we see. Behind the scenes, they’re organizing, managing and keeping the entertainment running smoothly. This piece from Travel Weekly gives a glimpse into what it’s really like. In short, it’s exhausting!

While some cruise directors are laid back, more often they’re not. They’ve got their own TV shows. They hold the mike and grab the attention.

But when the urge comes to try something different, CDs shift to a corporate job, only to find themselves longing again for the shipboard spotlight. That’s where they’re a celebrity—second only to the captain.

Sometimes they even overshadow the entertainers they’re introducing. Some CDs are so beloved by passengers that they become the attraction themselves. Cruisecritic.com forums praise some of them by name. Some threads even track what ship each CD is sailing on. John Heald’s blog charts the CDs on Carnival ships. Disney too posts a schedule not only for CDs, but captains too.

Whether you like your CD in the foreground or background, making you laugh or just giving directions, you have to admire them for the efforts they put into making sure you—and thousands of your cruise companions—are having a great time.

Musing's Top Tip: For more tips and quips, check us out on Facebook and Instagram!

Dark Skies, Bright Lights

Do you like the sea at night? After all, when there’s no view of land, the sky and the sea seem to merge into one vast sheet of darkness. And yet…

It can be the most peaceful time. Or it can be a lively time.

When the party’s inside. With all the hustle and bustle inside, a walk on the deck in the dark can be mellow and romantic. (Remember those moonlit scenes on the “Love Boat”?) With everyone inside, you can feel like the ship belongs to you.

When the party’s outside. That’s a whole different vibe. Princess often does a ‘70s theme party for rockin’ under the stars.

Lighting up the night. Unobscured by buildings, trees or wires, the dark sky shows off its stars. Then there are the ship’s lights—around the pool and strung overhead. The Boardwalk and Central Park neighborhoods on Royal Caribbean’s Oasis class ships are ablaze of colored lights when the sun goes down.

Central Park decked out in lights on Harmony of the Seas

Enjoying an empty hot tub, lights and the dark on Oasis of the Seas.

At the drive-in. Princess’ Movies Under the Stars is a way to enjoy the outside at night while cozy under a blanket with a front-row view of the big screen. You’ll even get popcorn or milk and cookies—without ever leaving your seat.

Snuggling up under the big screen on the Caribbean Princess.

Night on the verandah. Lights off, feet up and wine in hand. A room with a view as the ship cuts the water in two. What a soft and soothing way to ready for another full day!

Photos by Roger James Photography

How Could a Cruiser Get in the Mood for Love?

The “holiday with the hearts,” as someone I know called it, is upon us with full force. It’s made me wonder, how could a cruiser get in the mood for love? Or, how could a lover get in the mood for a cruise?

I did have a few ideas of how cruise lovers could embrace their passion—onboard and on shore:

A romantic meal by the sea. If you’re between cruises, you could book a dinner in a room with a view—by the ocean, lake or river. (Or if you live in Florida, you can eat at your own table and stare out at the pool.)

Something nautical for her neck. Show her (or him) your love—and love of cruising—with nautical bling. Put an anchor around her neck or pin her to a palm.

Snorkel and stay dry. Miss being up close and personal with the fish? Visit your local aquarium.

See Sea World. A trip to Florida won’t cost you as much as a cruise. And you can see Sea World while you’re there. You can even check out the beaches. The water won’t be blue, but you can pretend.

Buy her a book on cruising. If you still have something to learn, you’ve got a bunch of choices—from traditional travel tones of Frommer’s and Fodor’s to funky ones like The Essential Little Cruise Book with a quantity of quick tips on the ship experience.

Book a cruise on the Love Boat. Sorry, the Pacific Princess has been put out to pasture. But Princess has a gleaming newer fleet to choose from. They’ll even fog horn the TV show theme song for you.

Miss the show? You don’t have to try hard to find the reruns. You’ll enjoy comparing the TV cruise ship experience with the real one.

Wonder what they’re doing now? Check out this video on the “crew” as they reunite for the show’s 40^th anniversary.

Playing games. Throw a cruise-themed party with your own takeoff of the “Newlywed Game.” But remember that you will see these people again.

Need more ideas? See my sidebar posting “Romance on the High Seas.”

Don’t like these ideas? Have a heart. Happy V-day!

Romance on the High Seas

Romance with chocolate: the Love Boat Dream
Dessert on the Regal Princess

It’s no wonder the infamous TV show was called The Love Boat. Cruising and romance go together like, well, love and marriage.

In fact, more than 85 percent of cruisers take along their significant other.*

There’s something about cruising that brings out the romantic in us. Maybe it’s the way the sea shimmers in the moonlight. Or the unbroken horizon suggests anything is possible. Or maybe it’s just that we’re on vacation.

Whatever the reason, the cruise lines want to help you along when you’re in the mood for love. Here’s just a sampling of what you can do with your one-and-only:

Tie the knot or announce you’re glad you did. Royal Caribbean, Princess and Carnival all have packages for doing weddings onboard. Princess also has some for engagements, honeymoons, vow renewals and anniversaries. Carnival will even help you get married on the beach.

 

Bliss and blue skies on the Regal Princess' SeaWalk

Two for dinner. When you sign up for your cruise, you can ask for a table for two in the main dining room and can usually get one. There’s a limited number of them, though, and while most are okay, you can get one in a weird spot. If this happens, you can always ask for a change.

Dine al fresco. Do a leisurely breakfast, pre-dinner cocktail or quiet dinner for two with room service and a view.

Or make it extra special. The specialty restaurants will cost you more, but you get better service and better food than the main dining room. Some of the settings are more fitting for flirting too. Like the plush high back chairs of Oasis of the Seas’ Central Park 150 or the dark moody lighting in the Regal Princess’ Crown Grill.

 

Making it special at Sabatini's on the Regal Princess

Be formal. Formal nights were made for romance—with both of you in your best digs, find your ship photographer of choice and pose for posterity.

Room for wine and roses. From Royal Caribbean’s room décor packages to Carnival’s goodie baskets to Princess’ Norman Love’s chocolate gifts to Norwegian’s flower deliveries, you’ve got a number of choices for building a stateroom love nest.

Massage à deux. For the ultimate in peer pampering, consider a couples massage in Royal Caribbean’s Vitality Spa. In Princess’ Sanctuary, you can be massaged side-by-side each other and the sea in your own onboard cabana.

Kiss on camera. On the Regal Princess’ disco night, you might get your romance up on the big screen. Cameras scan the crowd and if lands on you, your fellow cruisers will egg you on to indulge the Love Boat Kiss Cam and see your smooch on the more than 300-square-foot poolside screen.

Together, alone at the ports. Take a carriage ride in San Juan, a floating raft for two in Carnival’s Mahogany Bay or Amber Cove, or spring for seclusion in a cabana by the sea in Royal Caribbean’s Labadee.

Find some seclusion by the sea in a cabana for two at Amber Cove

A final thought (or warning). Whether you find yourself stoking the fires of your passion on a raft, at a table or in the spa, no matter how tempting, just say “no” to being on the marriage game show—if you still want to be in love on the morning after.

Note: Facilities and amenities vary by ship.

* Cruise Lines International Association website, www.cruising.org

Princess Plus: a Review of the Regal Princess

The Regal Princess—the newest in the Princess fleet—takes what we love about its ships and betters it:

More pizzazz in the piazza. The Regal’s stunning atrium is way bigger, giving a spacious and open feel to the hub of the ship. It’s all done up in marble and glass, with lounges that jut towards the center and tables positioned to eye all the action.

And action there is. In turns, there was a steel drum, varying bands and juggler, as well as the Captain’s Welcome champagne waterfall, a balloon drop—and on our trip, even a groom whisking his bride across the dance floor.

The International Café is as good as always, with its 24-hour array of terrific quiches, sandwiches, salads and desserts.

A robust buffet with better navigation. Princess has always had the best buffet at sea, with quality unmatched by the other mass market lines. This new Horizon Court stretches out on both sides of the ship, with a Pastry Shop in between—think “H” shaped.

Part of the buffet, “Horizon Court Bistro,” has lighter fare (Note: you can tell the difference because the furniture is white while in the regular buffet, it’s brown. This is important because my first time there, I got seriously lost.)

There’s never congestion or seating issues, and the options are seemingly endless—from American fare to Asian, some even with a bit of spice.

To this foodie’s delight, there were was papaya and smoked fish such as mackerel, Mahi-Mahi and trout at breakfast (there was even an “everything chocolate” section the last morning). There were good choices at lunch, but dinner is where the really special stuff made an appearance: poached salmon; shrimp; cheeses such as Stilton, Port Salut, Havarti and camembert; and dried figs, dates and apricots.

Desserts at lunch and dinner—such as opera cake, peach cobbler, various mousse-y-cakes, pineapple

upside down—were nearly always of good quality. And you could always rely on fabulous rolls at every meal, which varied from sunflower seed-studded to focaccia.

Love that Norman. The Norman Love desserts are knockouts—as yummy to eat as to look at. The main dining room had several—a kind of tiered chocolate, merengue thing, and a chocolate and pistachio dome. The Crown Grill featured a milk chocolate peanut butter bar.

A dome of Love in the main dining room.

MUTS is now a must. The Movie Under the Stars big screen is not just bigger than previous ships, but the picture is much sharper. We were really taken aback by the difference. It’s now actually worth watching a movie you’ve been wanting to see on that screen. And you get a blanket and popcorn to boot.

What could be improved

Like all the cruise lines and all their ships, not everything is perfect:

MDR a mixed bag. The main dining room food was fair, with a few decent dishes amid a sea of mediocrity and sometimes, dishes that just weren’t quite right. A mixed seafood skewer early on and lobster tail on formal night were well prepared and flavorful. But the red snapper and beef Wellington were neither.

Design flaws. The Regal has some of the same weirdness in layout of other Princess ships, with challenges getting to a few of the dining rooms. 

And the jogging track on Deck 18 was clearly an afterthought. While it has wide separate lanes for joggers and runners, it’s a small track (seven laps=a mile) and when we tried to use it one day, we were shooed away, as the crew was doing maintenance there—at 6 p.m.

A small room with a view. The standard balcony staterooms are smaller on the Regal than the Caribbean Princess. If you can afford it, it’s a good ship to spring for a mini-suite, a Princess specialty. If you pick the right ship, itinerary and time of year, you’ll not pay much more for a mini-suite, yet the difference is enormous. Think full-sized couch vs. two chairs. More storage space than we could even fill.

The mini-suite feels like a hotel room. Pick your trip right
and you won't pay much more than for just a balcony.

The bottom line

Princess still deserves the crown for the best all-around cruise experience and the Regal delivers it best. Even the “Love Boat” “crew” thinks so.

Find this shrine to the TV show on the Regal Princess, Deck 5, outside Guest Services; the six
original cast members are the ship's godparents. 

Musing’s Top Tip: Princess now has an app you can use with the ship’s wi-fi at no cost to access your account balance, daily activities and more. No downloading is needed; simply put your phone on “Airplane mode” while you’re on board and bring up the cruise line’s website.

You can also text your cruise companions while you're on the ship, but this part of the app has to be downloaded with real wi-fi from Android or Apple online stores. You can do this for free if you download the app before the trip. See Princess' website for details.

What's a-Musing About Cruising?

 …When the captain of one of the world’s largest ships imitates the acrobat coming on stage next.

…When the captain of another huge ship drives its little tender into a port to passengers’ applause.

…When water sloshing around a pool one windy day causes someone to say, “I didn’t know this ship had a wave pool.”

…When an elderly woman grips the arm of her son, saying, “I must be getting old; I’m feeling so unsteady.” “Ma,” says her son. “The seas are six feet—everyone’s feeling unsteady.”

…When you can’t understand why your sea card isn’t opening your door—until you discover you’ve got the wrong stateroom.

...When, during the “Newlywed” takeoff, a husband says the most unusual place he and wife “did it” was in a casket at a funeral home.

…When my cruise companion, who shrinks in horror from the spotlight, thinks he’s far enough from the stage to avoid the comedian’s eye…and then finds out he isn’t!

…When there’s a bear in my coffee and a monkey in my room

... Drinks are a-blinking in colored lights

...Balloons drop for people to pop

...Kids in bow tie and teens in tie-dye

...A guy in a kilt, women dressed to the hilt

...The crowd going wild for “YMCA,” the Love Boat “crew” dancing disco today, Ft. Lauderdale beachgoers waving us away…

In fact, there’s a lot that’s a-Musing About Cruising. Don’t you think?

Happy holidays, happy cruising and see you in 2017!

Princess Preferred: A Review of the Caribbean Princess

A mouthful of luscious Love
from the Caribbean Princess

From the Norman Love truffle pops at the Welcome Toast to the restaurant-like beverage service in the buffet, Princess is filled with surprises that make it my favorite among the mass market cruise lines.

It won’t blow you away with bumper cars or carousels, but what it does deliver is consistently solid service, attention to detail and an eagerness to please.

The recent trip on the Caribbean Princess, our fourth on the line, proved to be as good as the first. With many of the lines noticeably scaling back, Princess is an exception. Here’s some of what made it special:

Ship shape. Princess’ mini-suite is ideal for those who want more space but not at a suite price. It’s essentially the size of a hotel room with two flat screen TVs, a full-sized couch, large counter, and porch furniture featuring reclining

A mini-suite is a perfect size but
doesn't come at a steep price

chairs, foot stools and a large table. The closets in the mini-suites—as well as the balcony rooms—are the largest we’ve had on any cruise line, and can accommodate three hanging shoe bags, along with a whole lot of clothes.

The staterooms—as well as the public rooms—were immaculate. You’d really have to look hard to find any evidence that the ship was built 11 years ago.

The piazza, the hub of ship activity, this trip featured a pianist, a we-can-play-just-about-anything band and singer, steel drums and a former circus performer who twirled lighted hoops in a blaze of 

A performance in the piazza

color and grace.

The only downside to the handsome piazza is that it can’t always accommodate everyone who wants to be there. Getting a good enough view to take photos of the Mardi Gras party or a seat to eat your International Café quiche can sometimes be all but impossible.

Food; themed and otherwise. Speaking of food, it ranged from fair to good, in both the Main Dining Room and Horizon Court buffet. One innovation in the MDR was Caribbean cuisine, a welcome reminder of where we were. And it was nice to see lobster tail still on the formal night menu.

Horizon Court themed nights were a lot of fun and we found ourselves there more than the MDR. German night was alight with a color-changing, larger-than-life beer stein (in ice, not on ice), landjagger bites and German hams, pretzel rolls, red cabbage, sausages, and linzer and sacher tortes. Italian night, with its gondolier-costumed waiters, served up prosciutto and hunks of parmesan, fennel au gratin and pasta many ways.



Part of the bread spread on German night

The bakery stuff is where Princess really excels. The breads are great—from the sunflower-studded rolls to the cheese-topped croissants to the onion-infused focaccia. The chocolate desserts were excellent, rivaling some of the best bakeries on land.

The ship was as generous with its buffet hours as it was with the food offerings. You can get breakfast until 11:30, lunch until 3:30 (if you miss this, there’s “afternoon snack” from 3:30-5:30, which is a scaled down lunch), and full dinner is available until 11. Late dining was an especially mellow meal, just us, a few other night owls and the crew.

Fun and games. While standard fare, the entertainment was generally good; highlights were a juggler/comedian whose not-G-rated shtick brought on belly laughs, and a magician/comedian with same-but-different sleight-of-hand tricks and fast wit.

In fact, everyone seemed to be a comedian on this trip—including the cruise director, Paul Chandler-Burns. The Brit’s quips shot out like sparks—in an understated, under-the-breath sort of way—and made him the ideal emcee. His banter during the “The Marriage Match Game Show” made it easily one of the best we’ve seen on any ship.
 

Love Boat disco

There were several themed parties, the most memorable was the “Love Boat Disco Deck Party” held by the pool. The ship’s singers and dancers, dressed officer-like in white pants suits and captain hats, did the hustle and other moves, while the Movie Under the Stars screen revived scenes from the TV show, interspersing its octogenarian cast members somewhat disconcertedly jiving to a disco beat.

Well served. Service onboard was attentive from the room steward to the well-orchestrated disembarkation. Ironically, some of the best service we had was in the buffet. One night, I was asked by three different waiters within 10 minutes if I wanted any water or coffee.

With the generous room space, great service, varied entertainment with plenty of laughs, satisfying food sprinkled with surprises, and four good Western Caribbean ports (seven days of sun didn’t hurt either), we felt gloriously pampered from ship to shore. And felt that Princess did its best—and succeeded—in helping us “come back new.”

Small talk: Princess Patter, the onboard newsletter, was named after the very first Princess cruise ship, the Princess Patricia.

 Photos by RJ Greenburg